As much as 2013 changed my
life, 2014 smiled and said, ”You’re not done yet!” In fact, had I read the fine print leading
into this last year, it probably would have stated…”Hang On…BOTH Hands Required!” Well, being that guy that leaves the directions in the box when assembling
something new, this past year came together for me with no spare parts left
over after assembly! It was a really
good year in the same way an exercise workout can be good…it wasn’t easy, I worked
hard, and it feels good having made it through another one.
Enough analogies! I think
I’ve made my point…I’m happy!
2014 was an adventurous
year. The Grand Canyon rafting trip was
huge for a number of reasons. The more
time that goes by, the more significance appears in each rapid the canyon
provided (see walliebloggin.blogspot.com – March 2013, for that story). Recently a friend from that trip wrote to
invite me to join a crew for another canyon trip, rowing another raft. He had signed on and thought I might be a
good fit as well. I felt very honored to
have been asked on a number of levels and having been behind the scenes of my
own trip, I can feel the gravity of choosing your crew and every decision that
is made prior to launch day. This spring
I will be thinking of them as the canyon touches each of them as only it
can…keep the open side up!
The other big story for me
in 2014 could be rivaled with any outdoor adventure, but the setting for this
one is heart-based. If you are not
sitting down, I suggest you do. If the
chair you choose has a seatbelt, buckle up!
I met, got to know, fell in love with, and immensely enjoyed a woman
named Beth. So much so, this fall we got married!
So as you read this, I can
see you doing the math in your head, counting on your fingers and toes, and
double-checking with the calendar on your wall.
How does that happen? Let me help
you understand…it doesn’t matter. Some
have said that finding someone so soon after experiencing the loss of a spouse
is a testament to how strong your relationship was. I prefer to follow that train of thought vs.
any opposing ones. Either way, time can
fly or it can drag, the only thing we know for sure is that it stops for no
one. So let me introduce you to Beth.
I met Beth and Beth met me,
while we were both looking in the opposite direction of new relationships. It is almost indescribable what we
experienced in our early days and we simultaneously decided to be open to
whatever life was placing before us. It
was difficult for each of us in our own ways, to allow the possibility of what
was unfolding, to do just that…unfold.
One layer at a time, we exposed ourselves to one another through hours
and hours of talking. No TV, no group
activities, no “games”…just talk. Eye
contact, body language, word choice, and the possibility of the unknown was
scaring the crap out of each of us. And
yes, we talked about that too.
As the days ticked by, our
relationship grew exponentially. Not in
length, but in depth. As we celebrated
mini-anniversaries…one week, one month, etc… a smile would accompany each one
with a knowing look of disbelief as though we both were thinking, “How could
this be happening?” We were our own
naysayers on one hand and yet excited about the possibilities on the other, as we
kept looking forward.
As much as I was petrified
of “dating” after more than 30 years of not, two nice things about dating at my
age were … #1, I had a pretty good idea of what kind of person would fit me and
I didn’t have to spend my 20’s figuring it out.
And #2, I didn’t really care about others opinions for the most part. This was about me, not them. I was under surveillance by my family and
trusted them to let me know if I was straying into troubled waters.
Beth had her son Drew, also
the man of the house for many years, to keep her best interests in the
forefront. We both knew he had a pretty
good idea of what was best for his mom and I was lucky he let me in to be part
of that.
The proposal came during a nightly
flossing routine and involved cell phones (you read right! flossing), the ceremony
was intimate and quick (like the relationship itself), and our honeymoon will
be a series of trips that will fill up our years together. Because every time we travel from here on, it
will be an extension from the previous one and that way the honeymoon will
never really be over.
Sounds pretty easy,
right? Remember the workout
analogy? The hard work part? Think about combining two well-established
households. Those of you who have done
it know what I’m talking about. On top
of that, Beth sold her house, sent her son to college, sold her car, retired
from her job, and is slowly but surely getting her feet under her, as the dust
is settling here at the end of 2014.
The bonus I never anticipated,
but am fortunate to be a part of, is Beth’s son Drew. In the AM hours, well…there is no vertical
Drew, due to his horizontal status until the early afternoon hours of the day
(excluding school days…or at least that is what he tells us). The PM hours of having Drew in my life
involve him singing, farting (followed by disgusting eye rolls from him mom and
encouraging laughs by me), watching intimacy between him and his phone, and his
love of movies. He is full of energy
(after noon), is smart and driven, has a wonderful sense of humor, and loves
his momma. Ding, ding, ding…that’s what
makes him a bonus to me.
And then there is Tuck. He is hanging in there with his old dog stuff
that old dogs have to deal with. He is
coming up on 14 and is a calming force in my life. Even though he has always farted, he’s
assimilated to human farts. Never have I
heard a dog fart until recently. Tuck
has taught me to never underestimate a canine and maybe its because he has been
around Drew (Beth would add me as well), but his farts have found their
voice. They are no longer silent, but
deadly. Instead they have become verbal
and not deadly. The latter we attribute
to feeding him yogurt with his breakfast.
They use to clear a room and now, other than hearing them reverberate
off the walls, they are stench-less. He
has been my moment of peace for this
year.
 |
| Always keeping an eye on me. |
So, from my rear view mirror
looking back at 2014, it’s been quite memorable. Fun, aromatic, exciting, tearful, and healing. What every year should be! I hope this finds you healthy, happy, and
safe. CHEERS!
